Friday, July 11, 2008
When I gave birth to my first baby, Natalie, I remember my mom poking her head in the delivery room when she arrived and the Doctor telling her she couldn't pass the red line on the floor. She stood there as long as they let her and was so excited for this wonderful event. After they got me settled into my room and the nurse handed me my beautiful little girl, my mom said, "Once a mom, Mel, you're always a mom!" I've thought about those few words so many times over the years - happy times, sad times, challenging times, overwhelming times, uplifting times, frightening times and especially at this time. Those powerful, undeniable feelings of love that consume your whole being as your 'mother heart strings' as I call them, are played over and over again everyday of your life. And as mom said 'once a mom, you're always a mom!' It will never go away! My baby girl, Kaitie, danced the most beautiful dance to a song that reached out and grabbed me. Each time I watched her dance to this song I just thought of how all my children, my little babies have grown up into these beautiful, wonderful human beings. Each one is so unique and kind hearted and making wonderful lifes for themselves. There have been challenging times for each of them and I know they will have more challenges on their paths ahead, but they are each so strong and prepared. I miss my mom so much the past few days. The reality has sunk in. She was my calming influence, my rock, she made me feel like I could conquer anything and I just hope she really, really knew how much she meant to me. How greatful I am for everything she taught me and the love she showed me. Mom, Mother, Mama, whatever the title a mother may go by, those short words have so much meaning packed into them. I just felt like sharing these thoughts about how I feel about being a mom, it is priceless to me, a gift, a treasure and this beautiful song "In My Arms" says it all about how I feel towards my own children who will be 'my babies forever'. I also try to imagine that my mom made that same promise to me and my sisters that she would always be there for us and somehow, even now, she is holding us in her arms.